Try Not to Die Until You're Dead Lyrics

I smile to trick the fear inside me
I smile to seem like I'm improving
but the brave grin does not go in
A surface layer painted on the skin
of a body that is facing uncertainty
Yesterday I chased a dream
Now I just want to be able to sleep
Suddenly riddled with incapability
Funny how illness changes everything
Never really believed in believing
until I had to believe I would get better
and that was all I had, no knowledge or progress,
just hope, wafer thin hope
Clung onto with a fist
Must try not to damage it
I must believe
and even if I don't get better
Thanks for sitting with me while I cried
Thanks for easing the hours when I was too weak to stand
Thanks for all the little detours where we wandered off together
and found things more important than what we want
Those are truly treasured moments
and believe me I know
that it's hard to have hope
but I will try not to die until I am dead
I will try not to die until I am dead
I may be aching and exhausted but life's not over yet
So it doesn't hurt to hope and it will never hurt to try
Try not to die until you're dead