White Men Can't Blump

“Oh No”

Keithy flopped his knob away mid stream.
Massive wet patch on his chinos.
Pissed as a mute down at the Workers Club.
In the uni sex dunnies of all places. In walk some ladies, they see said 'patch'.
Keithy staggers back into the cubicle as they point and fucken laugh at him.

“Nah I'm just a little sweaty.”
Gesturing towards his groin. Full of shame, locks the door.
“Get the fuck out of here you dumb sluts or I'll belt the fucken living shit out of you all”.
Keithy hears a loud voice scream at the women. A chubby hand pops under the door.
“Pass me your dacks, I'll dry them for you hun.”
He hands over his pants and undies, the dyson airblade works fast.
“Can you open the door darl?” As soon as the lock turns to green she barges into the dunny,

“Do you Remember me?”

“Oh No! You are that bitch who pissed on my lap.”
“I am the bitch who just saved your arse. Sit the fuck down, let mummy dress you Keithy.”
She pulls his jocks up over his knee caps, before he knows it she is stuffing his cock into her mouth.

Keith drops his guts.
A nugget drops into the water
“Oi ya kinky prick you're into blumpys?”
Keith's very limp penis is bending,
like pushing rope into a hole.
He tries getting up but she's too strong.
She's put on a few since RSVP
He starts thinking about the stick books that he was flicking through today on smoko break.

“If you cant get a fat, It’s my fucking turn, cunt".
Wear the Jelly Hat” she says.” “More like a Jelly Sombrero,” he thinks to himself as a huge piece of flesh is draped over his head, neck and shoulders.

Keithy struggles to breathe as his mouth and nose are blocked by her labia.
“I just ate 10 dimmies for dinner washed em down with a litre of milk I've gotta take a dump so bad.”
A torrent of faeces spray out of her, Keithy cops a massive splash back
The poor cunt is now suffocating.

Keiths brain has been deprived of oxygen for three minutes.
If he doesn’t die, he’s going to be pretty wobbly from here on in.
Pissing his pants was really the least of his problems.